He Has To Go: Hammers Chief Deems Latest Payet Outrage 'The Final Straw'

Incontrovertible evidence

As it has become apparent that Dimitri Payet's refusal to play again for West Ham also extends to playing with his training colleagues in the U23 squad in their crunch match with Aston Villa tonight, other news indicates that Payet has also snubbed the club by refusing to play with a West Ham team in the crucial Tuesday night Division three DergHammer Subbuteo league.

The want-away talismanic midfield maestro wouldn't even entertain the possibility and failed to respond to two e-mails from the League Organisers inviting him to demonstrate his continued allegiance to the West Ham cause! Even worse, our investigative team have unearthed incontrovertible evidence (see pic above) that Payet is a Subbuteo fanatic but that HE ONLY PLAYS WITH OLYMPIC MARSEILLE PLAYERS!

Top DergHammers chief, Patsy McLooneyBangers, slammed the arrogant star's latest snub deeming it "the final straw" that compels him to change his vote in the ongoing VERYWESTHAM PAYExiT poll from 'Let him stay if he says sorry to the fans'  to 'Eat his liver with some fava beans'.

McLooneyBangers added that Payet's failure to engage with the long tradition of Subbuteo playing amongst top Hammers was yet another reason that he can never be a true Hammers legend.

Meanwhile, the Tuesday Night's Third Division Subbuteo competition continues despite Payet's absence with a crunch tie between Robbie's East Ham United and Trev's Upton Park Rangers. UPR will be hoping to field a full eleven players despite the recent horrific hoovering disaster that has kept half of their players out of action during midweek.