Monday 30 May 2016

Figures reveal that West Ham are the Fastest Growing Club in the World!!!

The latest Forbes listing of richest Soccer clubs reveals just what a sensational turn around the Davids and Mrs Brady have managed at the club over the past five years. Currently ranked 17th most valuable club at $542 million, having pulled in almost $200 last year. Even better they have grown the most (76%) in the past 12 months!!!

With their new stadium having a waiting list of over 20,000 for season tickets and a talented squad who are nailed down to long term contracts, a bright future awaits. No wonder the Hammers are being linked with every piece of talent that moves in world soccer right now!!!

Thursday 19 May 2016

Blowing Bubbles Boleyn Tribute
Hardcopies of Blowing Bubbles’ special Farewell Boleyn issue are running out quickly despite the gang printing five times the usual run. If you want one you need to move quickly!
The issue is a fitting farewell tribute to the Boleyn, and includes a variety of contributors describing their memories of the stadium ahead of the move to the Olympic Stadium this summer.
For those who do not have PayPal access an email to can allow for arrangements for alternative payment.

England Interloper Not Linked to Noble

The Mark Noble for England saga took another bizarre twist today as it emerged that one young fan decided to go a step further than Captain Claret by actually turning out with the squad despite not having got the nod from Hodgson!

The kid obviously realised that being the Premiership's most consistent midfield performer over the past three years counts for little or nothing in the Hodgson era and opted instead to go for a more direct approach to getting into Hodgson's plans!

Dressed up in official training gear his presence was barely noticed by the England team - which perhaps says little for the skillset of the existing bunch! Happily no harm was done but he was escorted away from the playing area after a few shots on goal.

Apparently Hodgson suspected him of being in some way linked to West Ham.

Meanwhile, Andros Townsend, Jack Wilshire and a group of other imposters you've hardly ever heard of are still with the squad.

Why the Europa League will be so different next season

As West Ham await the result of the FA cup final clash to learn whether their seventh-place finish will allow qualification for next season's Europa League, many fans will be wondering whether the Hammers can cope with the fixture congestion that would ensue.

Last season it was pretty obvious that Slaven Bilic had opted to use the competition as an adjunct to his pre-season preparations and seemed not at all disappointed to exit the competition in the early rounds. Bilic has been through the competition with Besiktas and is only too aware of the potential for a gruelling 20 game addition to the season for clubs that successfully progress to the latter stages. 

So, what is different this year? Why should Hammers fans want Man United to beat the Eagles so that they can face the prospect of endless Thursday-Sunday fixtures often involving travel to the far side of Europe?

For West Ham, Bilic has already built a surprisingly robust squad where apart from the inevitable rumour mongering that Payet is wanted by Real Man Barca actual fact his squad appears content with their lot. He has already indicated an intention to clear out a host of players who are not in his first team plans even though they have been useful squaddies - Song, Moses, O'Brien, Emenike, etc.

From experiences to date, one might expect that a healthy percentage of new recruits will shine and our academy/development squad is burgeoning with talent which raises the question that we don't have enough game-time opportunities for the squad!

For us fans, it is pretty obvious that there is a huge unmet demand for a slice of the action. With a season ticket waiting list estimated at 25,000, midweek European action would provide an attractive opportunity to see our heroes in action.

All in all, the Europa league looks so much more attractive this year. Come on Man Uni........eurghhhhhh...I just can't say it!


Tuesday 17 May 2016

Moore Than Just A Khazi Seat

With only hours to go before the big Upton Park fire sale Hammers fans are quickly learning what its like to support a 'big' club. Meeting the wage demands of a talented squad bursting with top internationals (except for Hodgson's England) is a costly business and requires all sorts of ingenious cash-making schemes. In one such example, fans recently learned that they can purchase their own plastic stadium seat at a mere £50 a go! Ouch!!!

However, top Hammers stalker Paximus has been scratching together his hard-earned cash to make an audacious bid to pick up an unusual bargain. With his cash at the ready he plans to grab one of the supercomfy stadium toilet seats.  Chances are it'll cost him a bit more than your standard B&Q khazi seat (currently priced at an enticing £4.87!) but it could be put to practical use rather than gathering dust in the Farewell Boleyn cardboard 'presentation' box that the stadium seats come in.

Other bargains on offer include a corner flag (bidding starts at £ that reach £200!) and the players bar sign (bidding starts at £50........we estimate it reaches £1000)...

Madness, pure madness........but we love it!


Monday 16 May 2016

FA to launch investigation into Stoke result

Slaven Bilic may have slain all the Premiership Goliaths this season but unfortunately his powers could not extend as far as preventing the Hammers from succumbing to yet another 'Stoking' at the Brittania stadium yesterday. The time-honoured tradition of the Potters seizing unlikely victories continued as West Ham spurned repeated opportunities to bury a lacklustre Stoke side.
However, with a series of unusual occurences, including three consecutive goal line clearances, many observers have drawn attention to the weird and unsettling pitch topiary at the Stadium. The centre circle appearing to house the footballing equivalent of a Crop Circle, creating a sense of nausea in those watching on television.
Long associated with the paranormal, both Stoke and the crop circle phenomenon remain a mystery to scientists. However, the known link to witchcraft and other foul behaviours has prompted the FA to consider launching an investigation into goings on at the Brittania.
Crop circles contain a measurable EM field from which can ripples of energy flow outwards from the epicentre of the designs - this demonstration that the crop circles are living, breathing, organisms raises the diabolical possibility that Stoke were fielding an extra player during the game!

Either way, in this crazy season of unusual phenomena, yesterday's Stoke result shows that some things remain constant. Meanwhile, Hammers fans remain hopeful that the Red Devils will overcome the Eagles in the FA Cup final, thus rendering yesterday's travesty meaningless.

Sunday 15 May 2016

The picture that captures the force that drives SuperSlav's Heroes!

Tuesday night's festivities provided a fitting farewell to the Boleyn with Manchester United the perfect victims of the force that characterises Bilic's West Ham. Manchester United provided the final part of the jigsaw as a rampant Hammers have felled all of the so-called 'Big Six', also throwing in a thrashing to Spurs to the mix. The spirit and determination that Bilic has instilled in his side is truly awesome such that even when the Hammers go behind there is always a sense that they can get a result. As Winston Reid peels away after sealing a well-deserved winner to cap off the Hammers comeback, the look of resignation on Chris Smalling's face captures the extent of the force that drives this West Ham team. Let's hope Super Slav can maintain it as we move to our new stadium!

Meanwhile, today's trip to Stoke brings down the curtain on a memorable season. We need to win to be sure of European qualification. A Payet-free side will need to be at their best to overcome 'Stokalona' but for Bilic's boys it seems no mountain is too high!

Saturday 7 May 2016

Careful What You Ask For!

Midweek rumours suggest that West Ham's response to Tottenham's enquiry about the availability of Cheikhou Kouyate at £15million was to ask for Harry Kane in a swap deal. While this sounds like a typically cheeky David Sullivan put down, in fact you would have to wonder if Spurs would be getting the better deal.

Kouyate has established himself as a major part of the twin-engined West Ham midfield, alongside Captain Claret Mark Noble. However, Kouyate's speed has allowed Noble to press further forward this year knowing that his midfield colleague has the pace to track any counterattack if possession is lost. Moreover, Kouyate also pitches in offensively with his five goals coming at crucial times as he tends to pop out of nowhere to add an extra dimension to what is already a potent Hammers attack.

Many observers feel that Kouyate was unlucky not to receive greater recognition at the recent Annual Awards where, if Dimitri Payet was out of the equation, one suspects that the Senegalese dynamo would have been in the spotlight. In any other year he surely would have scooped up the Hammer of the year award?

Equally, Kane is a tremendous talent and represents exactly the type of forward that West Ham will be looking for in this Summer's transfer window. The best way to look at these rumours is that linking Kouyate to Kane indicates just how highly the Hammers management rate their midfielder. The good news is that having recently signed a five year contract it's clear that Kouyate is going nowhere.

And finally, as his offering at the Annual awards shows, the lad can sing!


Tuesday 3 May 2016

Irish Eyes Smiling at Hammer of the Year Awards

It's been a great night for the Irish at the Annual Squad awards at London's Park Lane Hilton tonight. Reserve netminder Darren Randolph has scooped the save of the year award for his triple block against Liverpool in the FA Cup, while young midfielder Declan Rice has won the academy player of the year.

Elsewhere, Reece Oxford grabbed young player of the year while Dimitri Payet has so far captured the top scorer award. It seems likely that he will also grab player of the season but if there is to be any competition it would most likely come from Cheikidh Kouyate and Michail Antonio. The winner will be announced soon....


Ex Hammer Supplants the Pope

Errrr....wrong ex-Hammer, dude!

It's almost too bizarre to take in......Leicester City are Premiership champions!!! They started the season at 5,000/1 - that's a long shot compared to the 2,000/1 odds quoted against the Pope playing for Celtic!

But as we all know, despite his interest in footy, Pope Francis simply couldn't compare with the celestial skills of ex-Hammer Carlton Cole.

Observers are putting 'the Leicester thing' down to a rupture within the very core of World football. It has been known for years that just as with the Bilderburg group who control world politics, FIFA has been dominated by twelve foot high lizard aliens for decades and now, with Sepp Blatter and his cronies gone, anything is possible in the previously conservative world of football.

Speaking of which, for those who missed out on the Leicester betting fest, Man City are 6/1 against winning the Champion's league outright.

However, despite his latest MOTM performance at the weekend, there are no available odds for Mark Noble getting a late call up for England's Euro squad. None whatsoever.


Monday 2 May 2016

Top Hammers Defect to Arsenal


First up, sincere congratulations to Leicester City for completing possibly the greatest shock success in a major soccer league in modern times. Their Premiership title surely ranks even higher than the Greece Euro championships of 12 years ago. One wonders are the odds of them repeating the triumph next year greater than avoiding relegation? ....Just a thought!

Meanwhile the race for the Champions League continues. The Hammers bid looked to have been snuffed out by a run of terrible refereeing decisions, but Man City's defeat to Southampton has reignited hopes. With three games left the Hammers are 5 points adrift of City who have two remaining fixtures. Their next clash is at home against the Gooners.

If West Ham can win all three remaining fixtures they will need City to capture less than four points as the Moonies superior goal difference essentially equates with an extra point. City have the hapless Swansea in their final match so we need an Arsenal win at the Etihad - a tall order, but not's a rare sentiment in these pages but in hushed tones we are starting to mumble....'Go Gooners' !!! .......splutter, splutter.

Man United have a point more than the Hammers but inferior goal difference such that we simply need to keep winning (including in the remaining home fixture with them) to leapfrog Van Gaal's men. Next up is Swansea at home before the tricky away trip to Stoke. Fortunately, Mark Hughes side are well out of sorts and may not quite provide their usual challenge. 

All in all, 10-1 against our achieving fourth place are probably the right odds. Oh for better luck in those draws that should have been victories against Chelsea, Arsenal, Palace and Leicester. They say that luck balances out over a season......hmmmmm.

Cheering for Arsenal will be.........'strange'!!!

Either way, this has been a fantastic season in which we have been equal to any other side - home or away. We enter the Olympic Stadium in the best shape (financially, managerially and squadwise) that we have ever been in during the Premiership era.




Sunday 1 May 2016

Payet Responds to Criticism

It's pretty difficult to find fault with Hammer of the season Dimitri Payet. His footballing skillset is simply jaw dropping and surely unmatched in the Premiership. However, it is his effectiveness that really catches the eye. With nine goals and ten assists he is the principal reason the West Ham are on the verge of qualifying for European football.

Payet's precision from set pieces keeps the opposition constantly under pressure not to concede free kicks or corners, in turn creating space for his attacking colleagues with only the most foolhardy defenders daring to lunge into the challenge once we are in shooting range. Perhaps his contribution in defence is less visually impressive, but his ruthlessness on the break seriously discourages opponents from pushing too far forward and makes for an easier ride when we are defending a lead.

However, just recently Payet has been criticised for trying too hard with some of his efforts described as Hollywood in their flamboyance. In the lead up to the European Championships, perhaps Payet is trying to grab the attentions of Didier Deschamps? As such, it was reassuring to see him get back to basics yesterday where he played a key role in two of our goals by letting the ball go early.

Poor West Brom need the season to end so that they can rebuild. Despite a bright start whereby Adrian had to be at his best to prevent the Hammers falling behind, once Kouyate scored there seemed to be only one likely outcome as a ruthless Hammers inflicted an embarrassing defeat on the home side.

Next up Swansea at home. In truth, Arsenal's win yesterday probably ended our Champion's League hopes. Barring a collapse by Manchester City West ham fans will be left rueing those four consecutive draws where crazy refereeing robbed us of 8 crucial points. Europa League qualification looks very likely with any finish above eighth but with all sorts of records still at stake (highest Premiership finish, best ever Premiership goal difference, longest home run unbeaten in the league etc) Slaven Bilic will be trying to maintain the hunger. The prospect of Man United in a fifth place decider to finish the season also provides ample encouragement to keep our focus - especially after the recent cup exit.

All of which is undoubtedly bad news for Swansea who come visiting Fortress Boleyn next week!