Fed up with all the squad-unsettling speculation regarding his future, future Hammers Captain Momo Diame has decided to follow in the tradition of our best poets and ‘show not tell’ by chaining himself to the gates of the Upton park stadium in order to send out the strongest possible message to Tottie Hotspuds, Liverpooh and the Gooners of Middle earth that he is a resolute Hammer (at least until his current contract expires at the end of next season which gives us another season to become the top six club he so covets!).
|Got any Ketchup anybody?
In a further move to counter the crazy speculation that characterises the Summer break, Hammers chief David Gold has issued all squad members with some handy hand cuffs from the Ann Summers range. Hopefully these will keep our players well busy and physically challenged while they are inactive over the coming Summer break .