Thursday 24 April 2014

Vote or die!!! Hammers look to South American way...

You heard it!!!
As the newly formed Hammers Media Consortium launched a poll examining fans views regarding the future management of the club, sources have indicated that they may be considering enforcing compulsory voting for all 'proper' Hammers' fans. Just like the world's premier footie nations of Brazil and Argentina, the east end outfit favour mandatory voting in an effort to embrace the exciting prospect of actual democracy at the club!!!


Although death is among the punishments threatened for non-compliant fans, it is thought that the additional punishment of enforced and repetitive scrutiny of the 2006 Cup final penalty shoot out interspersed with images of Frank Lampard's 100 greatest goals selection will 'encourage' most sensible Hammers fans to engage with the poll - although it is thought that Amnesty international are investigating this particularly horrifying and viciously annoying form of torture.

Unneccessarily cruel punishment
Meanwhile, in a crafty plan to 'out' any Millwall fans posing as Hammers faithful, the Kartel have included a question canvassing fans views of the Hammers greatest previous manager - with any votes for Avram Grant immediately excluding respondents from any further participation.

Are Millwall in the third flight yet or not just yet?
Otherwise, all eyes are on whether computer hackers can access the personal accounts of Hammers stars past and present to identify how they are voting, in what will surely turn out to be the greatest demonstration of footie democracy in the modern era!

Err...probably a spoiled vote?
If you haven't voted yet, make sure to do so as soon as possible as the poll ends on Sunday!

Vote at :


  1. Wow!! Showing your jealousy there! But I can't blame you, what a complete joke of a site this is! Get a life! FFS

  2. This is just a sad pathetic attempt at replicating The Game's Gone Crazy!!!! A rubbish attempt at that! Give it up mate ������

    1. Thanks for the constructive feedback.

    2. How dare you compare us to a merely modestly zany vehicle like the gaymes gawn cwazi - we are much more mental than that. We challenge you to a nostril posturing contest to decide whether we should change our name to 'the games not half crazy enough to justify £50 a visit'

  3. verywestham.shitewebsite/getyourowndomainnameprick24 April 2014 at 18:56

    Those west ham sites should do a vote to get this piece of shit website taken down!

    1. So angery - were you bullied at school?
      or maybe you still haven't got over the 2006 cup final?

  4. So harsh, do you get excited as you gush out this angry vitriol? I'd hate to meet you in real life as you sound REALLY strong.

  5. actually, we are modelled upon the 80s art-rock movement led by bands such as the Monochrome set and They might be giants. Football, on it's own, is quite dull.
    Thankyou for your attempted pattern recognition, albeit incorrect.

  6. are you related to willy Wonka? maybe his cousin who worked for the TSB?


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