Ever since the failed career of ‘squiggle – the artist formerly known as Prince’, astute observers have been wary of foolish name changes. While most footie fans smirk at the ridiculous monikers of American football franchises (with Dolphins, Bears, Buffaloes, etc) the emergence of the Hull City Pussycats has fans looking over their shoulders as they look to futures likely to be characterised by more and more intrusion from foreign investers who simply don’t appreciate that the Southampton Sharks and the Stoke City Porcupines are just nafftastically NOT on.
Down at West Ham United FC all manner of modernisation is taking place as Messers Sully and Gold seek to liven up the brand that has endured since the swinging sixties. The Allardyce factor is undoubtedly an element that will contribute to the choice of beast that West Ham might be linked to – and right now with our sizeable squad with it’s potential for physicality would be best likened to that supersized creature the Hippopotamus, with the West Ham Hippos or the London Olympic Porpoises (LOPS) the most likely animalistic label we prepare ourselves for.
This may sound pretty awful for most Hammers fans BUT spare a thought for the Liverpool Leopards, the Swansea Cheetahs, the Fulham Fishfingers and the Brighton Beavers.