Hammers Want Jenkinson Back

The victory over Crystal Palace was an important moment in West Ham's season as they demonstrated that there is much more to our current team that just a certain want-away Frenchman. Importantly, the introduction of Sam Byram as a specialist right back made a massive difference to our set up, allowing Michail Antonio to play up top alongside Andy Carroll - to devastating effect!

However, despite Byram's return, we are still light on right back cover as Superslav has clearly decided that Alvaro Arbeloa is not to his liking. Former Hammer Carl Jenkinson has been mooted as a possible signing and our recent fans' poll indicates that the majority (70%) want him back at the club.

With Jenks given the freedom of the city by Arsene Wenger, there are a host of interested clubs. The current favourites are Crystal Palace where he could link in again with Sam Allardyce and allow James Tomkins to shift to centre back. Rumours have it that Palace hope to seal this deal today but there is still time for a late Hammers swoop!

Here Comes Trouble...

SuperSlav has done his best to paper over the cracks for today's crunch clash with Crystal Palace by reverting to a (probable) three at the back, buts whatever way you look at it, one gets the sense that Big Sam will smell blood!

James Collins gets a rare start with many of the view that he might find himself at Palace by the end of January! Nobes returns instead of Fernandes to partner Pedro Obiang in midfield. The ability of this pair to cope without the AFCON-busy Kouyate will be a key determining factor in today's outcome.

Up top, Feghouli and Lanzini will be trying to link with big Andy to show what we can do without L'Etranger Dimitri Payet. Maybe the freedom of playing without trying to constantly get the ball out to Dimitri will help their form improve?

Sam will be loving his visit to the Olympic Stadium and will undoubtedly try to use a jittery home support to his side's advantage. Hmmm. A point might be a good result but all three would send out a much needed message to everyone that we are more than a one man team!

Cards and Cads: Red Dawn Awaits as Referees Prepare for New Season

You're a right Card!!!

When you talk to fans who have strayed from the game there are common themes as to why they have lost interest. Chief among them is the cheating culture among players but a close second comes the growing celebrity of the match referee. Too often key games become all about the personal preferences of wannabe school headmasters.

And so the governing body (IFAB) for setting the rules of the game (yes there is another separate quango to add to the chaos!) have announced 85 new law changes in an effort to promote fair play.....and improve the footballing experience, no doubt. More rules to deal with the rules that are already wrecking our game methinks...

These include a whole heap of new opportunities to dish out red cards! Even better, referees no longer have to wait until kick off to get stuck in - they can now dole out cards from the moment that the pitch inspection is concluded!

That should provide an excellent opportunity for Clattenspanner and his gang of dweebs to enact their revenge of the nerds fantasy from even before kick off. A look at last years cards table shows that Mike Dean won the much coveted Reddest Ref award with a whopping 12 dismissals, while Cranky Keith Stroud took the prize for most cards overall at 202 in 45 games!

The Hammers will need to be extra careful as last season was no Allardycian fair play heaven as Bilic's boys picked up a table-topping five red cards! (ED: Actually, Chelsea got six if you include Jose Mourinho's red at West Ham:-])

However, our referees will need to up their game if they want to compete on the international stage. Take Turkey, where last season's clash between Galatasarray and Trabonzspor ended in total farce as referee Bitnel sent off four Trabonzspor players, including Salih Dursun for mocking the referee by showing him the red card after the trigger happy ref dropped the card on the ground in his excitement!

After the match Dursun explained: "It was an injustice to play seven players against 12 players (he clearly felt that referee was helping Galatasaray). I showed the red card to the referee in order for Galatasaray to be 11 players"!

Dursun follows the example set by Paul Gascoigne who in 1995 jokingly handed back a mislaid yellow card to the referee during a match against Hibernian. Referee Dougie Smith failed to see the funny side of Gazza latest prank and duly yellow carded the card! What a cad!

Cards and Cads: Red Dawn Awaits as Referees Prepare for New Season

You're a right Card!!!

When you talk to fans who have strayed from the game there are common themes as to why they have lost interest. Chief among them is the cheating culture among players but a close second comes the growing celebrity of the match referee. Too often key games become all about the personal preferences of wannabe school headmasters.

And so the governing body (IFAB) for setting the rules of the game (yes there is another separate quango to add to the chaos!) have announced 85 new law changes in an effort to promote fair play.....and improve the footballing experience, no doubt. More rules to deal with the rules that are already wrecking our game methinks...

These include a whole heap of new opportunities to dish out red cards! Even better, referees no longer have to wait until kick off to get stuck in - they can now dole out cards from the moment that the pitch inspection is concluded!

That should provide an excellent opportunity for Clattenspanner and his gang of dweebs to enact their revenge of the nerds fantasy from even before kick off. A look at last years cards table shows that Mike Dean won the much coveted Reddest Ref award with a whopping 12 dismissals, while Cranky Keith Stroud took the prize for most cards overall at 202 in 45 games!

The Hammers will need to be extra careful as last season was no Allardycian fair play heaven as Bilic's boys picked up a table-topping five red cards! (ED: Actually, Chelsea got six if you include Jose Mourinho's red at West Ham:-])

However, our referees will need to up their game if they want to compete on the international stage. Take Turkey, where last season's clash between Galatasarray and Trabonzspor ended in total farce as referee Bitnel sent off four Trabonzspor players, including Salih Dursun for mocking the referee by showing him the red card after the trigger happy ref dropped the card on the ground in his excitement!

After the match Dursun explained: "It was an injustice to play seven players against 12 players (he clearly felt that referee was helping Galatasaray). I showed the red card to the referee in order for Galatasaray to be 11 players"!

Dursun follows the example set by Paul Gascoigne who in 1995 jokingly handed back a mislaid yellow card to the referee during a match against Hibernian. Referee Dougie Smith failed to see the funny side of Gazza latest prank and duly yellow carded the card! What a cad!

Three Irons on the Shirt!!!

Allardici.....Last man standing

Sam for Engerland....such a notion would have been bonkers any time until two weeks ago but now it seems the FA are about to lurch from one extreme to another - from the laissez-faire formations of Hammers-hating Roy Hodgson to the defensive fascism of Big Sam!

Sam has never won nought, mostly cos you've got to attack to win! It really is a measure of the lack of British managerial talent on offer than Allardyce now looks odds on to become the England boss.

One definite positive is that the embargo upon West Ham players getting the call up for England is surely over - great news for Nobes, Cressy and Antonio.

What's the bets that Tonks also breaks back into the reckoning....Grrrrrrr!

JOB well done

This week saw the end of the Hammers dream for a dozen players, with utility defender Joey O'Brien the most senior amongst the pack. His appearances at the start of the season in the Europa League seemed to auger well but he dropped down the pecking order and, once again, injuries prevented him from seizing the opportunity at right back when Carl Jenkinson departed.

O'Brien will be fondly remembered for his important contributions during the first two years of the Allardyce era when he played over 30 times during each of the promotion year (2011-12) and Premiership bedding down year that followed. All in all, he accrued 101 appearances in all competitions.

O'Brien perhaps suffered for his versatility, switching between right and left back but also with some appearances at centre half during that awful injury crisis of the season before last. Defensively tenacious, Joey perhaps lacked the nous coming forward that Bilic desires from his full backs. At 30, O'Brien still has plenty to offer but will be hoping to stay injury-free - something that has eluded him both at West Ham and Bolton, and limited his Republic of Ireland appearances to 5 turn outs.

No doubt the bookies will cite Big Sam's Sunderland as a likely next destination for O'Brien. Farewell Joey and the very best of luck with the next chapter.

Sam Speechless as Police Called in to Investigate

 

The proceedings at Upton Park seemed pretty routine yesterday as the Hammers again struggled against lesser opposition but, like better sides do, managed to get ahead through a piece of brilliance. Sunderland, meanwhile, were experiencing the frustrations of relegation-threatened sides by dominating but without seeming able to convert their increasing number of opportunities.

At such times the great and the gifted step up. These are the valiant men who can change the game, upset the pattern of things and create success where frustration had prevailed. Sunderland needed such a player, one with the chutzpah to take responsibility and try the unexpected. As their fans searched down the team sheet they came to Wahbi Khazri - the one player who had looked likely to provide that moment of genius.

With a matter of mere minutes left on the clock, Khazri came marauding down the left side of the Hammers box and looking up spied an onrushing team-mate in space. Instead of succumbing to the obvious - he spurned the simple pass across the box, instead opting for a swashbuckling manoeuvre that would kickstart a flamboyant thrust for glory for his beloved Black Cats. There would be no simple cross from Khazri - no, my friends, he opted for a scintillating and bodacious RRRRRRRABONA!!!!!...

and duly fell over himself as he miskicked the ball into touch.

The Police are presently conducting a thorough search of Upton Park and the surrounding area for any evidence of his credibility but so far have drawn a blank. Big Sam has refused to comment for fear of saying something he might regret!

Allardyce finally goes a step too far!!!

West Ham fans are very familiar with the defensive-minded tactics of Mr Allardici, at one stage last season even using an injury crisis to field a strikerless side! However, the tactical genius is trying to pioneer an even more defensive formation today by dressing his outfield players as goalkeepers!

Unfortunately, Sunderland will need at least some attacking impact if they are to get anything out of today's game as they are one down to a slinky Antonio strike. Surprisingly, Sunderland's best player Patrick Van Aanholt displaying some green defending by allowing the muscular Antonio brush past him.

Hammers are unbeaten at home over the past six months. They will be looking to push on and extend that record in the second half!
 

Selection Headaches for Slav Key to Kickstarting Eurodrive

While much of the attention will focus on the return of Sam Allardyce, today's clash is vital for both West ham and Sunderland, albeit for very different reasons.

The Hammers are still well positioned to make a late season charge for a European place. These efforts will undoubtedly be buoyed by the host of key players returning from injury. Although Diafra Sakho is not yet ready to enter the fray, Winston Reid and Andy Carroll may well enter from the subs bench today, while Manny Lanzini will possibly start.

At right back, Sam Byram and Michail Antonio are both in the running for a starting berth. Sunderland are offensively strong on the left side with Van Aanholt being their best performer this season such that the Hammers will need to be well organised at right back.

Up front, Emmanuel Emenike found his form with a brace against Blackburn last weekend and should get the starting berth with Andy Carroll ready to shake it up from the bench if needed.

Mike Dean will preside over proceedings and Bilic will be expecting him to police Sunderland's efforts to contain the other-worldly talents of Mr Payet. No doubt the ever-vocal home fans will provide every assistance in his important efforts!

West ham look increasingly capable of scoring right now, with a variety of potential sources of supply for goals. As such, if they can dominate possession they should translate that into scores with Payet, Emenike, Antonio, Lanzini and Moses all more than capable. Cheikidh Kouyate's rescinded red card is thus a key midweek development as it will add muscle in the middle of the park.

Meanwhile, Hammers fans will enjoy ribbing both Allardyce and Defoe as the pantomime villains in what should be another passionate day at the Boleyn. Kick off is 12.45.

Sunderland will try to keep it tight but we expect our gamechangers to make the difference. Put your cash on 2-0.

COYI!!!

"Worst in the World!": Sam Slams ex-Ham

A real shit job!

In amazing developments, it has emerged that ex-Hammers boss Sam Allardyce thought that he had the "worst job in the world"! David Sullivan revealed the extent of his former manager's unhappiness in an interview quoted in the Evening Standard!

Another

Although there can be no doubting the bottomless extent of fans expectations, with a salary of over 3 million quid a year it's hard not to question Allardyce's sanity.

With just 4 days left in the transfer window and striker resources at a critical low, his replacement Slaven Bilic will be feeling the strain but 'worst in the world' is perhaps overstating things, especially when Tottenham and Arsenal are just down the road.

Then again, with no positive news to report on the transfer front, maybe the canny Hammers board have chosen just the right moment to divert our attentions with a little harmless Sam-bashing?

Allardici to Sign Off the Italian Way

During his time at West Ham there has been intermittent talk of Sam Allardyce as a tactical mastermind of Italian proportions prompting the nickname 'Allardici'.

Tomorrow sees him lead his Hammers troops to his old enemy at Newcastlle - a club that disrespected him with the sack after a mere seven months!

The smart money is on Sam doing his old mate Steve Bruce at Hull a favour while settling an Italian-style vendetta with Nooocassel...

Either way, the subplot adds at least a little intrigue to a match that otherwise represents a snoozefest for Hammers fans.

Bilic: "With the greatest respect to women, football is the most beautiful thing in the world"

He taught me everything that i know...

So said ex-Hammer Slaven Bilic when embarking upon his managerial career with Croatia - an odyssey that lasted 6 years, including two World Cups. Somewhat surprisingly, Bilic is still considered a long shot for the Hammers managerial berth. However, as news emerged that Sam has grown weary of being so underappreciated and is planning to take on a new challenge, the race to find a suitable replacement is hotting up.

As Moyes, Klopp, Benitez and McClaren (????) all seem to be ruling themselves out of copntention, suddenly Bilic is looking like a decent bet. He has been at Turkish side Besiktas for the past two years where the team are on an upwards trajectory and at present they are neck and neck with both Fenerbahce and Galatasaray after 30 games, with ex-Hammer Demba Ba starring up front.

Although Bilic lacks managerial experience in the Premiership, he is well versed in the comings and goings of the Europa league with Besiktas exiting the competition just before the quarter finals after unluckily losing to Club Brugge in March.

In addition, Bilic cut his teeth as an international manager with the CRoatian U21 side - then moving up to the senior squad and bringing a talented generation with him. An ability to engage up and coming youth talent will surely be a key attribute of the Hammers next manager as for many, the real dividend from moving to a bigger stadium is the belief that we will then be able to hold on to our emerging talent rather than feed them on to the likes of Man U and Chelsea.

Bilic's career win percentage is 56% - which compares very favourably with Big Sam's which is just short of 40%. That includes six years at International level. The premiership is a demanding league, but Bilic's record suggests that he would be well suited to it. Moreover, as the above quote demonstrates, his footballing philosophy is well attuned to the West Ham Way.

Ladbrokes are offering odds of 8/1 on Bilic being the next West Ham manager - looks tempting - a bet of £35, if successful, would cover a season ticket at the Olympic Stadium this time next year!

In the time of chimpanzees i was a monkey



We're too sexy...

The words of the old Beck classic come to mind as two sides on losing streaks - West ham (4 of their last five) and Stoke City (last three) - come together to try and end their respective bad runs.

West Ham are close to full strength with Enner Valencia available again, while Stoke's side reads like a Republic of Ireland teamsheet with Glenn Whelan, Mark Wilson, Jon Walters and Stephen (not) Ireland likely to start.

West ham will be watching the caution count as they still harbour hopes of a back door entry to the Europa League via the fair play ratings system. Avoiding cautions against a physically robust Potters side will be a considerable challenge.

Hammers, we are coming for Ya!

Meanwhile, Stoke boss Mark Hughes has bemoaned the perceived lack of 'sex' appeal amongst British-born managers citing Sam Allardyce and himself as examples of underappreciated managerial (presumably) sex gods. In bad news for Stoke, they have been forced to widen the pitch at the Brittania stadium in order to comply with Premier League requirements for next season - a change that will undoubtedly impact upon their ability to compress games into tight physical encounters.

Either way, somebody is gonna lose their loser status today. We predict a 1-1 'thriller'. Our intrepid reporter Patrick 'Jeremy' Paxman will be in attendance to watch the ballet!

West ham call upon American Soccer Guru ahead of Leicester Clash

Let's hope there aren't too many tedious goal stoppages!

Are you ready for a flashbulb moment?....Hardly likely today folks with a hopelessly midtable Hammers facing the desperate Foxes we can expect a turgid affair. With the need to avoid yellow and red cards, whilst treating the referee with absolute politeness (not easy for an away side where somebody needs to speak against the baying home horde!), along with the uncertainty over Big Sam's future (yes - we are suggesting that players try harder to avoid injuries when they know that they could be looking for a new club in the Summer), we needn't expect blood and guts from our lot.

And then there's the Foxes recent good run of form where their results have not done their performances justice. They deserve a lucky break, we got ours against Slumberland last time out.

Then again, fortune favours the errrrrrrrr...no, not brave, actually its usually the side not in relegation trouble. In contrast, those down in the danger zone always seem to attract calamitous bad luck (as Hammers fans know only to well from previous campaigns). In a classic example of such ill-fortune, Leicester lost our 4-3 to a soft goal and a poor penalty against Spurs.

With the Europa League issue still alive one suspects that many Hammers fans will be more interested in the card count than the score!

Which provides an ideal opportunity to revisit the genius sports commentary of Bob Boonah - a man only too aware of the crucial importance of "Yellow Cardies".....click on Bob for an instalment of Britball!

Clarkson in Pole Position to Replace Allardyce

With Sam Allardyce's exit from the hot seat at West Ham seeming increasingly inevitable, bookies have begun to speculate as to a suitable replacement. A myriad of possible managers have been suggested - from David Moyes to Slaven Bilic, but top sports psychobabbleologists have suggested that, having become dependent upon being governed by a big arrogant authoritarian figure, similar qualities in any replacement would lend themselves to a smooth transition for the emotionally-fragile playing staff.


With that in mind, the free and available Jeremy Clarkson has been mooted as the ideal candidate. Larger than life, bombastic and handy at pugilistic enforcement if needed, it has been suggested that he could readily fill the shoes of big Sam. Moreover, the desire that any new manager would add flamboyance to the current 'efficient but on the dull side' Ford Mondeo-like squad would be more than welcome as the East End giants try to rediscover the West Ham way.


Clarkson's odds were slashed when he was spotted at the recent West Ham versus Chelsea game on what was in all likelihood a scouting mission. Moreover, other sources have revealed that Messers Gold and Sullivan have commissioned Ferrari to provide a signing-on softener for the automotive fanatic.




However, Clakson's appointment would not come without it's problems. Having little or no knowledge of basic football tactics could be an issue, although this did not prevent Avram Grunt from occupying the role for a whole season of entertainment. Perhaps more problematic would be his well documented difficulties working with Argentinians. This could prove to be a serious obstacle in working with Mauro Zarate who, it is rumoured, will be paired with fellow Argie and Hammer's legend Carlos Tevez when he returns to the Premiership next season!

What do you think - could Jezza do a job for the Hammers?

 

Sam: Death Squads are the Way Forwards for Under performing Referees

Lead us to the bstard in black

As Hammers fans were still reeling after managing to lose to Arsenal after a bizarre refereeing decision denied them a crucial lead in the 6th minute of their recent Champions league face off, it has emerged that Sam may be forced to consider the use of death squads to heighten awareness of what is an acceptable standard of behaviour.

WE WANT YOU!.......to give a fair number of close calls in our favour...

Allegedly supported by Uncle Sam in Latin America during the 1980s, death squads proved a very effective means of focusing the attentions of the population towards better regime compliance.

Luckily for referee Neil Swarbrigg he does not live in Iraq or possess a time machine that might teleport him back to Latin America in the 80s or indeed to Romania in the 1930s when the use of extrajudicial punishment was first used, as in either case he would undoubtedly be towards the top of the most wanted list compiled by any reasonable West ham fan.

Meanwhile, the usually tiresomely partisan Arsenal Wenger displayed unusual Christmas cheer when he admitted that he was also surprised by the decision to disallow Alex Song's stunning goal.

The Hammers sense of grievance was further heightened by the denial of two very decent penalty shouts, while Arsenal received a soft penalty that changed the game such that having totally dominated the first half the East enders went in 2-0 down at half time!!!

In response to Uncle Sam's call for extrajudicial deterrents for under performing referees, Big Sam is said to have declined to agree. "Nobody wants that kind of coercive culture in football, after all - its only a game! Maybe prolonged periods of detention in harsh penal colonies would suffice".

Observers have noted that the availability of the hellish environment of League one might be an ideal punishment for crap referees, highlighting how the threat of having to endure a spell down there with the really sad cases (like Sheffield United) would likely serve as a major deterrent.

However, political analysts have observed that the emergence of phenomena like death squads is almost inevitable in any fascist dictatorship.

FIFA were unavailable for comment when we tried to contact them.

Carroll: West Ham can Win the Champions League

The media furore around Andy Carroll continues to grow as the resurgent striker has taken to postulating about all manner of possibilities for the buoyant Hammers. Having been ridiculed for suggesting that West Ham could win the Premiership, Carroll refuses to de deterred and has now boasted that West Ham will beat high-flying Chelsea at Stamford Bridge on Boxing day!!! Citing Sam Allardyce's grandmaster managerial capabilities, Andy is convinced that the Hammers can achieve anything with their current squad of players!

Colourful imaginations are not new to the Carroll clan, with Andy's great-great grand Uncle Lewis Carroll once boasting "Sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast"! However, beating Chelsea away from home was never one of those six things.

'I promise I wont spend the cash on Nigel Quashie'

Undoubtedly this Hammers squad is the strongest for many seasons, but the looming African nations Cup will deprive West Ham of three of their most important players in Alex Song, Cheik Kouyate and Diafra Sakho. As such, Sam Allardyce will need to use all his grandmaster skills to squeeze some cash for suitable replacements in the transfer window from Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle David!

 




One option would be for the Hammers to play a wild card by leaning on some of the fringe players in the squad who are currently struggling to find a starting berth for East London's finest. However, with crunch matches against Liverpool and Manchester United scheduled for the mid point of the tournament, the likes of Joey O'Brien, Carlton Cole and Kevin Nolan will need to try and find some match sharpness as soon as possible!





     Luckily West Ham have their own Mr Rabbit in the form of the one and only Mark Noble who is due to return soon with his Duracell-like qualities as the engine room for the bubbles men.

 

Alternatively, maybe there's one last chance for Ravel to finally achieve his potential for West Ham?


Either way, a result against Chelsea would be truly audacious!





Perhaps the last word is best left to Andy's wise old uncle...

 

Matchfixing Scandal Overshadows Hammers Victory Over Swansea

After the midweek bonanza wherein VERYWESTHAM urged Hammers fans to bet a million on neither Guy Demel nor Joey O'Brien scoring against West Brom, the footballing world braced itself for a full enquiry into VERYWESTHAM's uncanny Nostradamus-like ability to predict the outcome of games after the sensationally astute site advised fans of an impending 3-1 scoreline with Andy Carroll tipped to score!

I Andy

Proceedings were thrown into further intrigue by Swansea boss Gary Monk's comments that West Ham were not a one man team - an observation that was fully vindicated by Diafra Sakho's strike as well as the stunning performance of the returning Alex Song! In an effort to quell the growing suspicion that VERYWESTHAM may be using magic or some other sinister skullduggery to influence games, we have predicted Adrian to score a late winner in our next match!

He plays, he scores...

Hammers fans will be unconcerned by the strange events as they savour another stylish victory that places the Bubbles brigade in third place in the Premiership, and importantly, well above both Arsenal and Liverpool who are hoping to prise 'Wonderful' Winston Reid away from a future of European football at the Olympic Stadium next year!


A Winstone Read THAT IS Freely available to purchase





For the board, the result will be particularly satisfying as they continue to embrace the West ham way, with a commitment to managerial stability that has not been seen since the times of Greenwood and Lyall, complemented by swashbuckling football that is the envy of other sides.



1961-1989: the West Ham way

January will be a testing time for the Hammers - both on and off the field as they try to nail down Reid, Song and the impressive Carl Jenkinson, but the feeling at the club is so positive right now that it's hard to imagine any of the trio would really want to leave. West Ham truly are the most exciting side in the league right now and with the impending expansion that the move to the Olympic Stadium will bring, have the best opportunity that any of the also-ran sides of the Premiership have to make the transition to join the big boys in Europe.

Already preparing for next season

Happy days indeed.  Next up away at Sunderland who have won at home only once in eight attempts so far this season. we predict a 2-1 away win with Carroll again scoring and Adrian popping up late to head in a corner.



The latest premonition

 

Who wants to get rid of Sam now? Six months on from the fans poll Allardyce is laughing his socks off!

My Oh My! 

Here we are just six months on from the poll of fans in which 80% of the 13,000 West Ham fans who responded indicating that Big Sam should be sent on his merry way to allow for a return to the much lauded “West Ham way”.

The poll was also supplemented by fan’s comments – with one fan capturing the principal recurring theme that:

 “Sam's style of football is too one-dimensional. There is no plan B and he is adamant that he will not consider changing his style”.

The board received the results and we waited their response. One thing for sure about the David’s is that they are VERY media-sensitive, and if anything sometimes overtwitting on twatter!

And their response duly arrived – to many fans disappointment we were informed that Sam would be staying and that a new coach would arrive to bolster our attacking efforts. Many viewed this as a fudge.

Then Andy Carroll got injured and we managed to throw away a winning position at home to Spurs. Grrrr. Inevitably, the calls for action returned. Sullivan and Gold held firm-ish.

Then unexpectedly we suddenly morphed into the current swashbuckling outfit that is not just delivering open, attacking and VERY EXCITING football, but also getting results!

We lie fourth in the table this morning – and with a little luck we could be even higher! It’s nice to genuinely look forward to playing the bigger clubs knowing that we can really compete with them. The cup embarrassments against Man City and Nottingham’s Florist seem a long time ago now!

So Folks, aren’t you glad Sam put up with our carping, including some OTT abuse from some sections amongst us?

On behalf of VERYWESTHAM we want to say a big Happy 60th Birthday Sam – and in particular thanks for:

(1) Rescuing our beloved club who were in freefall when you arrived.

(2) Ejecting the underperforming and overpaid brats who had taken over the squad.

(3) Getting us back to the Premiership at the first time of trying.

(4) Establishing our position as a stable Premiership club with mid table finishes over the past two seasons.

(5) and most of all........Reintroducing the delightfully entertaining football that binds us as a group of fans who believe in their club and are passionate about its footballing philosophy.

COYI!!!

Liverpool to Lodge Complaint with the Advertising Standards Commission

The British Advertising Standards Commission were put on alert this evening as Liverpool FC were poised to lodge a formal complaint regarding misleading material having been provided to the unsuspecting public ahead of an event in London today. The event was billed as West Ham United (AKA ‘The Hammers’) versus Liverpool (AKA ‘the Reds’) and was scheduled for Upton Park this evening. Such a fixture guarantees a gutsy Hammers effort that ultimately proves fruitless as the mighty Reds take all three points and return to Anfield.

Not so today, however, as West Ham ran out 3-1 victors, with the score line more than deserved. Perhaps even more galling for the Scousers was the fact that instead of being presented with a negative and cautious Allardycian outfit, they encountered a swashbuckling ‘continental’-style Hammers who dominated for long periods by virtue of free-flowing passing footie the likes of which hasn’t been seen at Upton Park for some time! Pool were left reaching for the phone directory to get the number of the advertising standards authority as this was no ‘West ham’ as they know it!

 

It’s hard to know where to start with the accolades but the Sakho-Valencia strike partnership looks very impressive, with Sakho in particular a real irritant for opposition and his exquisite chip in the seventh minute the latest contender in the ever growing list of Hammers’ goals of the season! Alex Song’s partnership with Cheik Kouyate looks formidable with their speed, passing and physicality proving too much for the Liverpool midfield! It's hard to see how or where Kevin Nolan will fit in when he is fit again, ahem.......

 

At the back, we looked more like the solid outfit of last year and it was great to see James Collins returning to the fray. Winston Reid's opener caught Liverpool cold, but his all round performance underlined the importance of holing onto perhaps our best player as we get ever-closer to the Olympic Stadium. Mark Noble kept the whole unit ticking over and, in the presence of decent passing midfield partners, looks like the first class player Engerland need to shore up their insipid midfield. Even Adrian got to pull off a few important saves, but perhaps more tellingly. Looked confident and secure during set pieces against a tall Liverpool side.  

But perhaps the man of the match award should go to Stewart Downing – a player who towards the end of his Anfield career was cruelly (and unfairly) dubbed one of the worst players to play for Liverpool – but has been a consistently excellent performer for West Ham and this season has returned to the kind of scintillating form that a few years ago made him one of the most sought-after talents in the English game! Downing has tormented our opponents this season and has a bag-full of assists to prove the point. Even better, he has been pitching in with some canny defensive cover for the evergreen Guy Demel…Today he was simply rampant against his former employers!

 

Liverpool never really got going and in all honesty bring to mind the wisdom of Blackadder’s Lord Melchitt – “Liverpool without Luis Suarez is like a boy without a willy” In fairness, they simply came up against a red-hot West Ham side. Morgan Amalfitano's goal was simply the cherry for the top of a sweet soccer cake...

Next up the Red devils………simply delicious!!!