Thursday 14 January 2016

Morrison To Get Another Chance at the Boleyn

No he's not - at least not as a permanent part of the playing staff! Since his announced inclusion for the Mark Noble testimonial, the rumours have grown regarding a possible return to West Ham for Ravel Morrison. Currently stranded at Lazio, where he has once again failed to settle in, Raveldo needs an out and many observers (e.g. Footballfancast) believe that could be Slaven Bilic's West Ham!

However, such speculation is silenced by any logical review of the facts. Slaven Bilic has spoken candidly about the need for "harmony" in his squad (ask Morgan whazhisname!). Moreover, with the current riches in terms of attacking midfielders, Bilic simply doesn't need Morrison, who even at his best wouldn't get within an asses roar of this much improved Hammers side due to the presence of Payet, Lanzini et al.

Bilic is far more likely to gamble upon more game time for the eager, focused and disciplined Josh Cullen, who has been skirting the margins of a first team start for weeks now. It's simply tantalisingly exciting for Hammers fans to reflect upon the effect training alongside Payet and Lanzini is having for Cullen and Reece Oxford.

West Ham are unlikely to gamble in this window, unless a decent striker becomes available (err NOT Chaz Austin, quoted at £12M with only 5 months left on his contract and only having played once since November). Meanwhile the Morrison speculation continues to attract the attentions of the poorly informed. Quite simply, despite multiple opportunities, Ravel blew it!

In an effort to finally communicate the true odds of a Ravel return we contacted everybody's favourite bookmaker - Paddy Poormaker - to seek odds on a Morrison return. After a delay caused by much guffawing they offered us the following odds;

We think legendary Doors frontman Jim Douglas Morrison is a decent bet, especially given new evidence to support the fact that he faked his own death to escape the twenty-plus paternity suits he was facing at the time of his disappearance. He has apparently been spotted playing for a second tier team in Senegal and if he's one tenth as useful as Cheikidh Kouyate we would love him!

Much less attractive, is the possibility of Van 'the grumpy man' Morrison joining the Hammers. However, his recurrent difficulties in getting on with anybody would make him a poor investment. Meanwhile, the Baggies James Morrison is a decent Premiership performer but simply to 'average' for the current West Ham side!

Click below to hear Jim's Doors playing Van the Man's 'GLORIA'.

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