Thursday 27 November 2014

Red Fury Follows Clatt's Latest Spat

Sheeran: Poptastic!

Hammers and Shatcar Denis fans were united in their anger this week as both had to come to terms with the frustration of being on the wrong end of a level five 'Clattenburging'.

The Premier League's most volatile referee followed up his dreadful performance at Goodison Park on Saturday, wherein he failed to maintain control of an ill-tempered affair while also allowing Everton an obviously offside goal, with another stinker in the Champions League.

The ever-busy bumbler found himself in the Ukraine on Tuesday night where he followed up Saturday's debacle by missing an obvious hand ball on the line by a Bilbao  defender just two minutes before time!

Clattenburg will likely need to give evidence to the FA after they launched an investigation into a melee that occured during Saturday's game - principally provoked by Clattenburg's inability to halt a tide of increasingly nasty challenges by the unchecked Everton players, possibly because he had mislaid his yellow card and lacked the balls to go full red on Naismith / McCarthy / Mirallas each of whom could have easily been sent marching by another referee for rash challenges.

Clattenburg is no starnger to controversy having been suspended earlier this month for showing an unusual interest in ginger pop stars by failing to observe proper post match protocol and rushing off to attend an Ed Shearer concert in Newcastle. A source close to the club has threatened to leak to the FA that Clatts also has an extensive collection of Simply Red CDs - a revelation that would likely result in a life ban as the FA continues in it's campaign to stamp out the growing ginger-popstar scourge that afflicts the modern game.

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