At this time of the season the real action kicks in as the big clubs impose their status upon the league in an effort to maintain the power status quo. Not surprisingly, this is a time when the conspiracy theorists also get busy highlighting how matches are manipulated to serve the needs of the big clubs.
And so 'little' West Ham find themselves embroiled in controversy as for two weeks running they have been denied victories by outlandish refereeing decisions! After the sickening disappointment of last weekend's Loftus-Cheat penalty decision at Stamford bridge, Upton Park provided the venue for the latest manipulation where Midfield dynamo Cheikhou Kouyate was dismissed for 'playing with obvious intent of getting a result' with the additional charge of 'tackling an opponent using physical force'.
All of which raises the important question: how high does the level of conspiracy go? With the current rate of ascension, the only answer for West Ham is the very top and for that we can only look to one place - the infamous Bilderberg Group! Formed in 1954, this elitist group comprises Royalty, senior politicians and leaders of the business world who meet in secret each year to plot the future of our planet. Their secrecy has provoked considerable paranoia with some observers even suggesting that members are part of an elite race descended from reptilian aliens!!!
All of which points to the frightening reality that Clattenburg and Bilderberg are essentially the same name, apart from their initial syllables. Just saying like...and let's face it, is there a more plausible explanation for MC's decision yesterday???
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| Sheeran: Poptastic! |
Hammers and Shatcar Denis fans were united in their anger this week as both had to come to terms with the frustration of being on the wrong end of a level five 'Clattenburging'.
The Premier League's most volatile referee followed up his dreadful performance at Goodison Park on Saturday, wherein he failed to maintain control of an ill-tempered affair while also allowing Everton an obviously offside goal, with another stinker in the Champions League.
The ever-busy bumbler found himself in the Ukraine on Tuesday night where he followed up Saturday's debacle by missing an obvious hand ball on the line by a Bilbao defender just two minutes before time!
Clattenburg will likely need to give evidence to the FA after they launched an investigation into a melee that occured during Saturday's game - principally provoked by Clattenburg's inability to halt a tide of increasingly nasty challenges by the unchecked Everton players, possibly because he had mislaid his yellow card and lacked the balls to go full red on Naismith / McCarthy / Mirallas each of whom could have easily been sent marching by another referee for rash challenges.
Clattenburg is no starnger to controversy having been suspended earlier this month for showing an unusual interest in ginger pop stars by failing to observe proper post match protocol and rushing off to attend an Ed Shearer concert in Newcastle. A source close to the club has threatened to leak to the FA that Clatts also has an extensive collection of Simply Red CDs - a revelation that would likely result in a life ban as the FA continues in it's campaign to stamp out the growing ginger-popstar scourge that afflicts the modern game.
At this time of the season the real action kicks in as the big clubs impose their status upon the league in an effort to maintain the power status quo. Not surprisingly, this is a time when the conspiracy theorists also get busy highlighting how matches are manipulated to serve the needs of the big clubs.