20 minutes: Diego ACTUALLY DOES get a yellow card as the horrible referee singles him out for punishment for simply showing a little healthy dissent about a penalty claim - some fans think Oscar should also have been booked for the obvious dive but they are just being unfair on the gentle little Chelsea chappies!
34 minutes: Oops, Diego accidentally bangs into referee Anthony Taylor. strictly speaking that's another yellow card under new rules but we wont be that harsh on cuddles Costa!
68 minutes: Dear dear me, Diego slips as he tries to tackle Adrian in the West Ham goal and in his efforts to avoid colliding with the goalkeeper raises his foot and unfortunately clatters into the West ham netminder. Adrian totally over-reacts and even refuses to shake hands with Diego. In typical fashion, lots of people who like to pick on Diego suggest that it was a straight red card offence, but they are just jealous of Diego's strength.
89 minutes: Diego scores a late winner but the begrudgers highlight that his celebration, which included running into the crowd, also deserved a second yellow. Spoilsports!
Post Match: Diego wins everybody over with his insightful honesty explaining how "Here I'm marked by referees, I'm going to be honest...if I do anything, it's different to what any other footballer does, and we need to see this because people marked me and I have to deal with it and ask God that these things don't mess me up or take away opportunities of the game that happens with suspension."
God was clearly on duty to protect Diego on Monday night. However, away from Stamford Bridge and the ineffectual Mr Taylor, Mr Costa may find that other venues and referees actually enact the rules of the game.